Colorado

March 6, 2009 coloradogirl

A winter statistic: 98% OF AMERICANS SCREAM BEFORE GOING IN THE DITCH ON A SLIPPERY ROAD. THE OTHER 2% ARE FROM COLORADO AND THEY SAY, ‘HOLD MY POP AND WATCH THIS.

NOW:

You’re from Colorado if…

You’ll eat ice cream in the winter.

When the weather report says it’s going to be 65 degrees, you shave your legs and wear a skirt or bar-b-que for dinner.

It snows 5 inches and you don’t expect school to be cancelled.

You’ll wear flip flops every day of the year, regardless of temperature.

You have no accent at all, but can hear other people’s. And then you make fun of them.

‘Humid’ is over 25%.

Your sense of direction is: Toward the mountains and Away from the mountains.

You say ‘the interstate’ and everybody knows which one.

You think that May is a totally normal month for a blizzard and hope it doesn’t snow on the 4th of July.

You buy your flowers to set out on Mother’s day, but try and hold off planting them until just before Father’s day.

You grew up planning your Halloween costumes around your coat.

You know what the Continental Divide is.

You don’t think Coors beer is that big a deal.

You went to Casa Bonita as a kid, and as an adult.

You’ve gone off-roading in a vehicle that was never intended for such activities.

You always know the elevation of where you are.

You wake up to a beautiful, 80 degree day and you wonder if it’s going to snow tomorrow.

You don’t care that some company renamed it, the Broncos still play at Mile High

Every movie theater has military and student discounts.

Everybody wears jeans to church. You actually know that ** South Park ** is a real place not just a show on TV.

You know what a ‘trust fund hippy’ is, and you know its natural habitat is Boulder.

You know you’re talking to a fellow Coloradoan when they call it Elitches, not Six Flags.

A bear, raccoon, or deer on your front porch doesn’t bother you.

Your two favorite teams are the Broncos and whoever is beating the crap out of the Raiders.

You know that the Denver Nuggets aren’t little pieces of gold.

When people out East tell you they have mountains in their state too, you just laugh.

You go anywhere else on the planet and the air feels ‘sticky’ and you notice the sky is no longer blue.

When you go for a walk anytime between the end of August and the first of October, all you smell is green chili roasting.

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